Michelle Gunn! Michelle Gunn! Michelle Gunn!

Ramen & oral sex. Unfortunately not the latest fad diet.

So what’s the connection?

Slurping.

The Japanese are famous for slurping noodles. Some claim it improves the taste, others that it expedites eating burning hot ramen. As cold noodle dishes are also slurped, the former explanation holds more water.

Slurping opens up the airways, lets you focus on the feel and structure of the food and allows the flavours to hit fully. It turns eating noodles into a sensory experience, and of course taste is only one aspect of enjoying food. Also, you’re letting the chef know just how much you’re enjoying his food.

So on to the sex. If you’ve ever watched a Japanese AV (adult video) you may have noticed that oral sex is often performed very loudly. Full of slurping actually. This seems to hold true for real life too. At least that’s the way the cookie crumbled for me. As Oscar Wilde once wrote, Life imitates Art.

The noises made during both activities are remarkably similar. They seem to be born of a noodle slurping culture.

Sex, amongst many other things, is a performance. You’re there to entertain someone (and in turn hopefully be entertained). One of the best ways to make things fun for the other person is to have, or at least pretend to have, fun yourself. It follows that you might approach oral sex with a similar attitude to when you order a bowl of noodles.

So cut loose, make some noise and… aah! That’s the spot.

How was your lunch?

. . .

Noodles